House Shopping

Well, after getting canceled two times we're finally getting to go back to the house that we FELL IN LOVE WITH. I'm ecstatic! I cannot beleive that we're about to buy a house! Sometimes the fact that we're getting married doesn't seem real to me. It seems surreal. Like a dream. I don't know, I can't explain what I mean. I'm cannot wait until the wedding!! I kind of want it to be over with so I can just be married to Brandon. I mean, I care about the wedding, of course, but I just want to marry the guy. Is that too much to ask? Last night Eugene Kelly had a lesson and he said "You should spend more time planning your marriage than planning your wedding ceremony." I think that's true. I can't beleive it's five months til the wedding. Today is kind of boring because it's my LAST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL!! I can't beleive it's already here. Tomorrow is GRADUATION and I'm about to wet myself! Did you know that if I'd have taken that $2,000 scholarship I would have started college THIS WEEK. Do you know how stressed out I would be?? I heard from the other three students that received it as well had to write an essay the first day. Wouldn't that suck? Planning a wedding while trying to go to college? I would have a heart attack. Brandon and I both thought it best that I go to college in a couple of years and just relax, keep up with the house, possibly pursue my photography dream. So the next couple of years will be still stressful but relaxing. Stress isn't healthy and I do want to be healthy. After I go to college in a couple of years we'll wait another couple of years and then possibly have a baby!! I want a baby so bad, but I know that if we had one now we'd be the most broke couple in the church. And I don't really want a baby right now because I want Brandon and I to be able to enjoy our marriage. College and a baby are two things that would NOT allow Brandon and I to do that. So yeah, that's everything latley. I'm excited about getting to go back to the house tonight. I think that Brandon and I are going to make an offer. Amazing, right? So let me talk about the house a little bit: It's gorgeous. I love it and it's perfect for newlyweds. It has three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room, a den (a second living room), a dining/office area (big), a kitchen, a long garage (so its a one car garage but its deep so you could fit in two if you needed), a cute back patio and a nice backyard. The hallway, the dining/office, the den and the living room all have wood floors. The bedrooms have carpet, which is fantastic. I can't really remember what the bathrooms or the kitchen has. I want to say that the bathrooms are wood and the kitchen might be tile or wood as well. I'm not sure though. The house has no trees in the front of it so we'll have to try and plant one or two. It has a funny mail slot so that the mail man can just open it, slide it in and the mail goes into a little box in your house. So you don't have to go outside to get your mail!! Crazy, huh? Anyways, that's all I have to say about it today. I'll try to post again, possibly on Sunday, because I'm going to be busy this weekend. Graduation tomorrow. Parties the next day. So yeah. Busy, busy, busy. I wonder when the bells going to ring. I'm ready to get out of here!! I hate being bored and not being able to go wherever I want online. It's annoying when your school blocks everything! Anyways, I'll post again Sunday and write all about the parties and graduation, etc. Later!

Finally!

Okay, so Brandon and I have been waiting to find out if he was going to be able to work on his own this summer (which would pay more, I think) and get his own work truck. Last night we finally found out that YES he can! Yay! So him and Jason are truck-searching right now. I'm happy because this means that we can finally buy a house. The house we're looking at is amazing. I fell in love with it!! Anyways, we're going to find out if we can get a loan more than what we're approved and if we can I guess we'll make an offer!! The house is more that our budget allows but he figured out a way we could get it if we liked it enough. Anyways, I'm pretty excited right now. I've been working on the wedding website and its awesome. A lot has been going on. A lot of personal things that are annoying to talk about. For instance, I've decided that I'm not going to college this year, so I turned down a scholarship ($2,000) so that I can focus on planning the wedding and then being a fabulous housewife! I want to be able to enjoy our marriage, not always be stressed because I have a paper in English due! And I say that and some say "Well, just postpone the wedding!" and I do NOT want to do that! Anyways, that's about it. Tootles for now.

Wedding Websites

I'm looking for a website where I can make my own wedding website. I want to make one that I'm able to get on at school to update, it's just that so many are blocked! I just found mywedding.com. Yay! I made an account and my website is www.mywedding.com/denalovesbrandon. I know that no one probably reads my blog, but if you do, check out our wedding website.

Chapter 2 -- Falling in love.

My alarm woke me to a brightly sunlit bedroom.

I love my room: My bed is at an odd angle in a corner with a white canopy above it. Very romantic. When Eli and I were together, he would sneak in through my window at night and we'd kiss for hours. Sometimes he'd want to do more, but I'd never let him. I beleive that I should only do that whenever I become a wife.

Anyways, back to describing my room...

In the opposing corner is my desk that I do my school work. Against the walls are hundreds of pictures that I have taken with my photography camera. I take my camera every where.

I finally clamber out of my vast bed and open my bedroom windows.

My family and I live in a perfect little neighborhood, with perfect little lawns and the neighbors have perfect little kids. Everything is prim and perfect.

I'm sick of it.

I look outside and see a moving van pull into the driveway of the vacant house next to ours. No one has lived there in a whole year and now someone is finally moving in. I hope that maybe there'll be a kid my age instead of another toddler or crying baby.

I hear a door slam outside. I look to see who it was and I see a boy with his shirt off, lifting up heavy looking objects and taking them into the house. Maybe he works for the moving company. He has a very nice body. Very tan and muscular. I need to stop looking. The Moving Muscle Guy will be gone before I get back home for work.

I finally get dressed after I'd lingered quite a bit looking out the windows. As I pull on the black dress pants and silky dress top for work I see that my ride to work is here.

I run down the stairs, past my mother in the kitchen, past my father in the living area, past the moving van, and into Kate's Chevy Camaro. Kate's father is a doctor and he has a very hefty salary, so she is, of course, the rich spoiled brat in our little town. Luckily she doesn't boast about her family's wealth. She's actually quite modest about it. Instead of the really cool car her father picked out for her, she wanted to drive a Chevy Cobalt instead.

"I think I'm going to quit my job." I complain.

Kate stares at me for a long couple of seconds.

"Do you realize," Kate scolded,"that if you did your parent's would kill you? You can't quit, you've been there too long.
"That's exactly it!" I exclaimed. "I need some change in my life, starting with my crappy hostessing job. I want something different!!"
"Well, when you're meant to do something different, it'll come to you. Your's will come to you. Just have patience."

We rode the rest of the way in silence.

We finally pull into the Floyd's Bar & Grill parking lot just in time to see a van full of boys pulling out, honking crazily.

"Ugh. Boys."

Kate is in a long term relationship with a guy named Gavin. Kate and Gavin love each other so much, sometimes it makes me sick. Not sick, but jealous. Sometimes I envy them, and I know I shouldn't. I just hate that I can't find that perfect kind of love too.

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"Welcome to Floyd's Bar & Grill! How many in your party?"

I hate my job.

"Two," the man barked.

"We want a booth," his, I'd assume, girlfriend barked.

Yeesh. No need to be so dog-like.

I've been working here today for five hours straight and I'm ready to go.

After I took the canine couple to their booth I hurried back to my hostess stand. Five more minutes. I tapped my pen against the counter.

Tonight I have plans with Kate and Gavin. Kate won tickets to a Rooney concert. I'm excited about going because it means I'll be getting out of the house.

I finally clock out, after what seems the longest five minutes ever, and went outside to wait for Kate on the curb of the sidewalk.

As I sit there thinking about tonights plans I hear something.

A screeching noise, like a dying monkey, deafens my ears. I look to my right and I see a boy on a bicycle trying to squeal to a stop before he hit me.

I scream. I don't even recognize that its me screaming. I feel something grab my arm and pull me out of the path of the clammering bicylce. I feel the pavement beneath me.

Owwww, my arm! I feel a sharp, intense pain shoot up and down my arm. I realized that my legs were entangled with someone else's.

"Are you okay," a male voice I didn't recognize asked me.

I hesitate and then I open my eyes. I'm face to face with a boy. A boy that had saved her from being pummeled by a raging bike. A boy that did not look like a boy, but looked like a man. A very good looking man. A young man.

"I-I'm fine. I think."

The pain in my arm goes away.

I try to stand and I feel like I'm floating, but not in a good way. I cling to the boy and he wraps his arms around me so that I don't fall and hit my head. I feel like I'm falling anyways. I look down at the hard concrete where I had just been sprawled. Then I look into the boy's eyes.

He's beautiful, I think to myself.

"Uh-d-uh...um.." I pull away from him and try to stand on my own, but I don't succeed and I stumble backwards. He reaches out to catch me and I'm back in his arms. Nice fit, I think, What's with this guy? Does he like me being in his arms or something? I like it. A lot.

I dare to look back into his shining emerald eyes. His sun kissed skin shines in the sun and his dark curls blow in the breeze.

"Are you sure you're okay," he whispers, "because you look sick."

"Yes. I'm fine." I manage to croak.

"If you don't mind me asking...What's your name?" the beautiful boy asked.

"Jewel. I'm Jewel."

He smiles. I try to breathe. I can't.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Mason."

Mason. Wow.

We stood there on the sidewalk awkwardly for what seemed like a long time, staring at each other.

"So, what are you doing ton-."

HONK HONK.

Kate pulls up next to the sidewalk and rolls down her window.

"Hey," I say uncomfortably.

"Who's your friend?" Kate whispers to me.

"No one. He's no one. Please. Don't."

Kate ignores my plea and calls to Mason.

"Hey! You. Who are you?"

"I'm Mason, and you are?"

"Kate."

"So, what brings you over to talk to my best friend?"

"Kate!" I exclaim.

"Well, I..I kind of saved her from being the victim of a bike wreck."

I feel my face heat up.

"Well, Jewel..Don't you think that Mason deserves some sort of reward or something?" Kate scolds. "Mason, do you like Rooney?"

"Yes," he answers confused,"why?"

I widen my eyes as big as I can at Kate in of way of saying If you do this I will never EVER speak to you again as long as I live!

"We're heading to one of their concerts in a couple of hours. I won four tickets and I don't have a date for my precious Jewel. Interested?"

Kate was good. I knew she hadn't won four tickets. She'd won two and bought me one so I could go with her and Gavin. I knew she was going to just buy one for Mason too. She's able to, because her daddy's loaded.

Mason looks at the ground for a long second, then looks at me, then looks at Kate, looks back at me and answers.

"Sure. Sounds great."

"Okay!!" Kate exclaims a little too excitedly. "We'll meet you at Jewel's house at 7:00. Here, let me give you directions."

She finds a sheet of paper and scribbles the directions to my house down quickly.

"We'll see ya then!"

"Okay," Mason replies,"See ya then. Bye Jewel."

"Bye," I croak as I jump into Kate's car and we squeal off.

"Kate, I cannot believe you! I mean--"

"Jewel! He is so cute! Did you just meet him or have ya'll secretly been dating for years, because he looks at you like he's in love with you!"

"He is not in love with me."

At least I think he's not. I think that deep in the back of my mind, I know he loves me and I think I might love him too.

Chapter 1 -- What happened.

Three things I will never have:

Romance

Actual True Love

Nothing Phony

"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle."

Marlene Dietrich said that. That is the quote that I chose to live by when Eli Luac broke my heart.

Eli and I had been going steady for two years an we were planning on getting married the fall after we finally graduated. I'd already started making my dress. We were in love, even though we were just juniors in high school. You know what they say...young love.

I gave Eli everything I had and he just crushed it all.

One night after the Homecoming Dance at our school, I caught Eli smacking lips with Kennedy High School's biggest tart, Melissa Thorton.

I was astounded. I yelled and cursed and hit. We talked and we decided that he wasn't ready for marriage, or me. I haven't spoken to him since.

He and I have moved separate ways. He's still with Melissa, even though she cheats on him all of the time, and I'm all alone.

I don't know if I can ever love again. I mean, I know I can, its just...I don't know if I want to. I'm scared of being hit by a pang of torment.

Before Eli Luac I was the most hopeless romantic you'd have ever met. Everyday I would daydream about kissing Tony Curtis like Marilyn Monroe did in Some Like It Hot! or singing about being hopelessly devoted to John Travolta in Grease. I would also fantasize what it would be like to be in love like Landon and Jamie in A Walk to Remember. This is my favorite daydream.

Finally I'd wake up and see that I was with Eli and we were happy. I'd see that we were like Landon and Jamie except I don't have cancer and Eli is not the bad boy type.

Eli Luac changed me. He makes me question if love is real, if it really exists. For me, at least.

Wedding Ideas....Pictures & more!

I've been researching bridal bouquets and wedding cakes. I've found some really neat stuff. I think that this bouquet is really pretty. I don't know though. I want something crazy, different. Its just hard to find really neat stuff that hasn't been done often. I don't know. I just want a really unique wedding. I want really neat, modern stuff. I really like this bouquet. I think its so pretty. I'm really excited about the wedding. I can't wait to finally marry Brandon! Its going to be so great. I wonder what married life is really like. I mean, I know it'll be really hard for us at first, but then over time we'll be okay and be able to handle all of the stress of everything. I don't know. Maybe I'm just rambling. That's probably it. Brandon and I have just been through so much as a couple. We've had to deal with people judging us because of our age difference. I've done some stupid things that I shouldn't have done, and he forgave me. Brandon is the sweetest, most caring, most loving person I'll ever know. I want to spend the rest of my life with him and I know that we'll have a very happy marriage and I can't wait for it! Here's my vision for the wedding reception: Round tables, pink table cloths, white flower centerpieces (?), glasses with pink dyed water with silver floating candles. Food tables: long rectangle tables, pink cloths with silver accents (like maybe candles or something else. I'll figure it out...). The photo-guest book table: same-ish. I've decided that whenever I toss the bouquet, I'm tossing my maid of honor's, because I want to preserve mine! :) Then the other's I'll use as decoration in some way. I can't figure out anything for a modern wedding. I really like this bouquet. I think its neat. Its different. That's the cool thing about it. Maybe I'm just phsyco! I guess I'm going to go for now, since I have nothing much else to talk about besides wedding!! Later!

6 more months!!!

I can't beleive its only 6 more months until the wedding!! I'm so excited, it's crazy! I'm not sure, but I think I might have to quit my job this summer. Dad will love that. Oh well. If I get the first generation scholarship then I'll have to take classes Monday through Thursday, 8 A.M to 11 A.M. It'll be a crazy summer. I can't wait to finally marry Brandon. It'll be so great. Right now I'm researching candy buffets. I've found some really cool stuff. I love the picture that is to the left. <--- I'm going to have all kinds of pink candys, with accents of possible silver and white. I want rock candy, big old fashioned lollipops, jaw breakers, peppermints, jelly beans, m&ms, pixie stix, starburst, candy cane sticks, and a whole lot more! I want to somehow have a cute sign, possibly saying "Love is sweet, so grab a treat." or "Love Sweet Love" or something like that. Nothing too corny though. :) I've also been looking at cool, modern cakes. I want for my whole wedding to be way different from anything anyone I know has ever had. Even though it'll be pretty small (around 100 to 150 people) I want it to be awesome! I'm really excited, if you can't already tell. I'm looking at the Martha Stewart Living website, surprisingly, and it actually has some decent ideas. I've been just browsing the web, trying to find modern wedding ideas. Shelia has been helping me. She gave me the phone number to a lady that did her daughter's wedding cake and the groom's cake for about $200 for both! Crazy, I know. I have a lot on my mind right now. Tonight is volleyball. I'm excited. Anyways, I'm going to end this post. I have 30 minutes until school lets out and I want to go call Brandon. Until next time!

♥Dena♥